


weekly poetry Xtravaganza

by LowFidelity



Category: Hiveswap, Homestuck
Genre: Pesterlog, Slam Poetry, pesterfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-25
Updated: 2018-04-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 23:47:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14436786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LowFidelity/pseuds/LowFidelity
Summary: CA: the grand slam,AT: fLIM FLAM,CA: word spam,AT: gOD, dAMN,CA: weekly poetry Xtravaganza!!! X:DDxefros and tavros commence their weekly poetry Xtravaganza. it makes the alternian aristocracy want to curl up into a ball and maybe cry a little.





	weekly poetry Xtravaganza

adiosToreador [AT] began trolling cuebatAficionado [CA]

AT: hEYY XEFROS,

CA: tavros!!

AT: i SAW, tHAT YOU WERE ONLINE,

AT: aND, tHAT MEANS YOU ARE ON THE LINE,

AT: fOR SOME PALLING, aROUND AND GETTING DOWN, 

AT: wITH THE RHYTHM, aND MAYBE A NICE CUP OF hERBAL lIQUID,

CA: hehe...Xcellent 

CA: i was kinda busy earlier but im free now!

CA: sorry about that

AT: iT’S OKAY,

AT: wHAT’S BEEN UP?

CA: just a stickball match!

CA: it was going really well until um

CA: our main pusher got culled for an Xcess of profanity

AT: uHHH, jEEZ,

AT: tHAT’S ROUGH,

CA: BUT on the bright side

CA: at least i got to play!! X:D

AT: cONGRATULATIONS,

AT: hONESTLY, sTICKBALL SEEMS TOO INTENSE, sOMETIMES,

AT: uH, dON’T GET ME WRONG, iT’S COOL THAT YOU LIKE IT, i’M GREATLY IMPRESSED WITH YOUR PERFORMANCE, aND, sTILL BEING IMPRESSED, cONSTANTLY,

CA: haha thanX!

AT: iT’S JUST WAY TOO INTENSE FOR, sOMEONE OF MY CALIBER, wITH, uHH,

AT: rEALLY NO TOLERANCE, fOR ALL THAT POTENTIAL DEATH,

CA: hmmm..

CA: ya i get what you mean

CA: maybe think of it as kinda like flarp

CA: its fatal but its not Xclusively about death or anything

AT: rIGHT,

AT: oKAY, tHAT MAKES PERFECT SENSE,

CA: haha good X:P

CA: what are you getX up to?

AT: uHHH, i WAS RUMBLING AND TUMBLING, wITH MY FIDUSPAWN EARLIER, 

AT: bUT, nOW THEY ARE SOUNDLY ASLEEP, aND, i CAN BEGIN PHASE TWO,

AT: tHAT IS, tHE SECOND PHASE, oF TODAY’S GRAND SLAM OF PRODUCTIVITY,

AT: }>:)

CA: oooooh SNAP!!!

CA: is this what im thinking it is

CA: could it be 

CA: the grand slam,

AT: fLIM FLAM,

CA: word spam,

AT: gOD, dAMN,

CA: ok this is going to take forever

CA: weekly poetry Xtravaganza!!! X:DD

AT: aBSOLUTELYYY! }:DD

CA: i really do need a relaXation break 

CA: or breaX, multiple

CA: after the big messy incident earlier 

CA: id love to Xfer our usual slamming day to today! we both need it

AT: nICEEEE, 

AT: mIGHT i COCKILY SUGGEST, 

AT: wE FREESTYLE?

CA: haha oh wow thats even more of a challenge

CA: im so down!!!

AT: yESSSSS,

AT: oKAY,

AT: yOU WANNA GO FIRST?

CA: are you maybe

CA: scared to start the sequenX? X:o

CA: well either way...i cant say no to that

AT: oHOHOHO, iT’S ONNNNN,!

CA: check it

CA: outgluts a mutthut, theres no time for shortcuts

CA: this underdogs gonna give the seadwellers the uppercut

CA: im no butler im a rebellion sutler

CA: and the tetrarchs gonna cook them up a mean supper

CA: of recoup-ers

CA: (wow that came out wrong i dont want them to eat us)

CA: (i just want them to eat IT you know)

AT: (i GOTCHA,)

CA: this is just another rendition of my decision to give our current hemocaste a precisional revision

CA: that all trolls are equal under birthright and the sun and this aint a real disputable provision

AT: (oH, hELLLLL YEAH,)

CA: but even though this planets out of whack and all that

CA: i know my mudbro tavros has my back, and all that

CA: i know our bloods too warm for the system to spare us

CA: but that dont mean theyre ever gonna chair us, or scare us

CA: that dont mean well bow to the heiress hell no

CA: cause tav is way cooler i only bow to a bro

CA: and if you wouldnt you probs have a juggalo flow

AT: oH MAN,

AT: yOUR DISESTABLISHMENTARIANIST RHYMES, aRE, dISESTABLISHING WHAT GOOD RAP IS, aND, rEPLACING THAT NOTION WITH ITSELF,

AT: uNAPOLOGETICALLY, wHILE SPITTING ON THE JUGGALO CHURCH IT JUST DISSED, aND NOT CLEANING IT UP,

AT: mETAPHORICALLY SPEAKING,

CA: wow… thanX tavros X:D

CA: ya i dunno where that all came from but i guess it was a X out of X!!!

CA: oh sorry go on its your turn

AT: oH, rIGHT,

AT: hERE GOES,

AT: tHE MAN HAS BEEN KEEPING ME DOWN, tHIS WHOLE TIME,

AT: hE SAYS, hEY tAVROS, lET ME DROP YOU A LINE, bUT,

AT: iT’S NOT REALLY A LINE, iT’S JUST A SARCASTIC CUE,

AT: fOR WHEN HE LEANS DOWN, aND, sAYS MY BLOOD’S GOT A PRETTY SHIT HUE,

AT: bUT THEN, i SAY, wELL YOU KNOW WHAT, yOU DON’T,

AT: hAVE,

AT: iT’S, tHE HORNS ON MY HEAD, tHAT i’M GONNA,

AT: sTAB,

AT: yOU WITH AND THEN, i’LL PIN YOU TO THE WALL,

AT: aND THEN WE’LL SEE WHO’S BLOOD, iS THE CLEANEST OF THEM ALL,

CA: (oh my god!!)

AT: cAUSE i’M A CHAIR, aND YOU CAN SIT ON ME FOR A WHILE, bUT,

AT: iF SOMEONE PICKS ME UP, i CAN KNOCK, pRETTY MUCH ANYTHING DOWN,

AT: i DON’T ANSWER TO A FUSCHIA OR A DRONE OR ANY CLOWN, 

AT: wE’RE tAVROS AND xEFROS, tHIS IS A GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN,

CA: (fuck yeah!)

CA: (sorry)

AT: (nO THAT’S GREAT,)

AT: aND, nOT THE SHUTDOWN INVOLVING ECONOMIC FALLBACK, bY THE WAY,

AT: uNLESS, wELL i GUESS THAT COULD BE GOOD, tHEN, bECAUSE THEY’D BE THE BROKE MOTHERFUCKERS, iN THAT CASE,

AT: uHHHH, aNYWAY,

AT: cOMPARED TO US SHITBLOODS, yOU REALLY AIN’T SHIT,

AT: aND, tHE MAN i REFERENCED EARLIER, wON’T EVER ADMIT, tHAT,

AT: tHE REASON, yOU KEEP THE RUST AND BRONZE BLOODS QUIET, iS BECAUSE,

AT: iF WE HAD IT OUR WAY, yOU’D, bE PART OF OUR DIET, 

CA: uh…

AT: mETAPHORICALLY SPEAKING,

CA: oh!

AT: fIN,

CA: *clap clap* X:O

AT: oH, aRE WE ROLEPLAYING NOW,

AT: * uHH, i SAY, *

CA: no...i just didnt know how to show i was clapping

CA: sorry my bad

AT: tHAT’S OK, 

AT: hAHA, i LOVE BUSTING IT OUT WITH YOU, dUDE,

AT: iT’S LIKE, rEALLY CHILL, bUT SIMULTANEOUSLY, nO HOLDS BARRED,

AT: i MEAN, oBVIOUSLY i DON’T REALLY MEAN ALL THAT STUFF, bUT, iT’S KIND OF FUN TO LET IT OUT,

CA: oh absolutely

CA: i just hope this doesnt infringe on the grubbels…

AT: tHE WHAT,

AT: oHHH, yOU MEANT,

AT: yOUR, uH, bAND WITH YOUR MOIRAIL,

CA: ya our whole thing is rebellion

CA: i dont know if dammX ok with me spilling all this material

CA: i mean… if i run out of lyrics idk what we can sing about anymore

CA: and this band is Xtra special to me X:(

AT: uHH, i CAN KEEP ALL THIS QUIET,

AT: iT’S NOT REALLY LIKE, i CAN SHARE IT WITH ANYONE,

AT: nOT TO SAY THAT IT ISN’T GOOD, mORE LIKE, a LOT OF MY FRIENDS, wOULD LARGELY DISAGREE WITH THE SEMI-TRUTHS WE HAVE SPILLED, 

CA: tru!

CA: i know youre not a blabberchute or anything

CA: i just keep messing up with this whole operational stuff

CA: im the blabberchute really

AT: tHAT’S OKAY, i MESS UP SOMETIMES, tOO, 

AT: wHAT’S IMPORTANT IS, yOU ARE TRYING YOUR VERY BEST,

AT: }:)

CA: hehe..good because i really am XXD

CA: ill ask dammek what he thinks of weekly poetry Xtravaganza later then…

AT: gOOD LUCK,

AT: hOW IS HE, bY THE WAY,

CA: hes been super busy because of the rebellion

CA: oh no im so sorry

CA: i mean the you know what

CA: X:X

AT: oH, sO THE “ yOU KNOW WHAT “ IS GOING WELL,

CA: i guess so

CA: theres this girl that seems to be frond of our plans!

CA: *fond

CA: maybe our slams wont just be slams in the future

AT: hMM, oK,

AT: i HOPE THE DIET PART, wON’T, uH, aCTUALLY BECOME A REALITY,

CA: oh no..thats kinda gross

AT: yEAHHH,

AT: bUT i’M HERE ON THE SIDELINES,

AT: kINDA LITERALLY, uM, sINCE i’M NOWHERE NEAR THRASHTHRUST, 

AT: aND, i’LL BE CHEERING YOU GUYS ON, wHEN THE TIME COMES,

CA: thanX again tav X:)

CA: i think i gotta make my Xit tho…

CA: dammek is messaging me and it might be another test

CA: catch you later!

AT: bYE DUDEEEEE,

cuebatAficionado [CA] ceased trolling adiosToreador [AT]


End file.
